Ahh London, I miss the amusement you bring to my life. It's 08.58 and I've already witnessed:
1. An absolutely rammed tube of human Tetris blocks - which, on stopping - saw one person get off and six people*attempt to get on.*Two succeeded and merged into the sea of static bodies, three returned back to the platform with tales of their failure, and one person evidently disappeared into some kind of space-time continuum never to be seen again.

2. Man I was queuing behind at Liverpool Street ordering flowers for his partner, who, when asked what he wants the message to read, responded with, "Yes, can it read, 'I miss being inside you' ...with two X's please, one little, one big..."London. Where maths isn't great, spatial awareness is beyond flawed, and romance lives strong.

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