How to get a 1-day ban from the gym
 

So today was leg day and the gym was fairly crowded, mainly people in their 30's-40's lallygagging about. I'm on my 4th set of squats and struggling on the last rep so I let out a sort of 'effort noise'. You know those noises you just naturally make when you're REALLY pushing of a rep? Sometimes it's loud, sometimes it's not, it just happens.

Well this one was pretty loud, not like a scream but loud enough that this woman, whom may I add was pretty... Large to put it nicely, comes up to me with this look on her face and starts giving me serious attitude. 'How dare you make such noises, who do you think you are?' 'Why are you trying to intimidate everyone?' On and on she went not even listening to me trying to explain to her that I was in no way trying to intimidate someone, it just comes out when you put forth enough effort for a rep. So eventually I get fed up with her and tell her to go away after about 2 minutes of complaints because my rest period was over and I had to get strapped up for my next set.

As I'm wrapping my knees she takes the clips off of my bar and throws them down a few squat racks. I look at her as she continues bitching and I let out the biggest roar/effort noise I could muster about an inch from her face. A couple guys who were watching this got a good kick out of it... Needless to say she wasn't very happy.

After I finish my workout about an hour and a half later on the way out I am stopped by an employee. I guess she went and complained about me right after and he informed me that the gym rules state 'No grunting' and that I was banned for a day.

Good thing tomorrow is an off day.

HAHAHAHAAAAA, this is too funny!
First thing to come to mind is the tv commercial for Planet Fitness.
Muscular Man Boobs Scare Up Planet Fitness Membership - YouTube

Lmaaaaooooooo Omg I'm crying. I've never seen that before.

Bang, bang bang bang, bang, do I need to put my email address in there? ...BANG,BANG POW, BANG, KOW

was this like at planet fitness the lunk alarm they are anti grunts


thank goodness I workout at home cause I am grunter especially on squats and dead(my favorites)


Even when I used to lift in a gym years ago, they didnt care, it was an oldschool gym.

Sounds like planet fitness

Where I am we don't have toooo too many choices for gyms so most of them cater more to the needs of the general population who just go to the gym to 'be healthy' which frankly drives me nuts. I'm all for people going to be healthy but not when they're putting limits on what people who are 'training' can do.

Theres no gym in my town. Had to invest a couple grand into my home gym. All used stuff.
I could never handle some slob or pussy giving me shit for giving my all on a heavy set.
I pretty much look at every out of shape person with contempt. People talk about having beauty on the inside but ive found in reality, the ugly on the outside is a mirror image of whats on there inside. Lazy slobs that try and discourage the dedicated and try to bring you down to there level

Exactly. There's a reason people look the way they do, which also happens to be the same reason people will buy a gym membership and then use it for a week or two then it never sees use again. That reason = lazy and mentally weak.

I caught a 7 day ban for punching someone in the face.

Two high school kids were lifting dumbbells way too big for them, about 90's, and at the end of one of the sets the kid kind of throws the dumbbell off to the side doing flat presses. Well, the thing hits the mat, takes a good bounce, and catches me right in the ankle about 6 feet away. I was pissed but it happens, no big deal, just kind of expected an apology. Know what his friend said? "Bitch better watch himself."

That 6 feet was just far enough for me to crow hop that little faggot and knock him out cold. You'd be suprised how hard you can hit someone at about chest level. It wouldn't have been a big deal if he had even mumbled sorry or something. His little homo friend had to wake him up and drag him out of there.

The people around me saw what happened so the manager wasn't pissed but he had to do something so I got a 7 day ban. Good thing I was leaving to go offshore for 30 days or I might have been pissed.

No offense intended towards the gay community in my use of homo or faggot.

One & done! Well deserved.

Sent via mental transmission.